As a former semi-professional bike blogger-turned gentleman bike blogger, I bullshit on a daily basis:Yet even I, a veritable font of bullshit, cant fathom how you could possibly do this on a daily basis on video. Yet YouTube is filled with cycling-themed content creators who seem able to do just that. So every so often I check in to see what theyre up to, but I never actually watch anything, because the video titles almost always answer themselves:Whats cycling like for someone who doesnt cycle?It sucks and its stupid.I mean sure, you can get used to it, just like a fetishist can get used to increasingly large butt plugs, but that doesnt mean everybody needs to try it.Heres another one I didnt have to watch:Whats the big mystery? Bike crashes happen because you suckor, to be charitable, maybe you dont suck but you were riding too close to someone else who does suck. But arguably even then if you didnt suck you wouldnt be near other riders who suck in the first place. (To wit: every Cat 4 bike race.) So basically you suck, and theres no way around it.And heres a subject that really doesnt warrant a video:Yes.The answer is yes.Meanwhile, I couldnt even read the title of this one without falling asleep:What happened?!? Nothing. Because theres no meaningful difference.This could just as easily have been called I wanked in an armchair instead of on my sofaheres what happened.But mostly cycling YouTube is just videos about bikes from China:I mean yes, theyre all from China now, but Im referring to the bikes that are actually marketed directly by Chinese companies, like the aforementioned Quick Pro:I could never have a YouTube channel, and not just because Im incredibly boring and nobody wants to look at me or listen to me. Its also because Id have absolutely no insight into the latest bikes from Quick Pro, except to point out to the potential buyer that youre not quick, nor are you a pro. Youre slow and you suck. So go ahead and buy one if you want, but it will do nothing to change either one of these fundamental truths.Hey, what can I say? Im finished trying to encourage people. If anything we need to bring back the gatekeeping. I dont want people to join anymore, theyre ruining bikes! (Relax, Im only 75% serious here.) There may have been a time I subscribed to the More people on bikes is always a good thing philosophy, but then it actually happened, and what do we have to show for it? I mean really, whats improved since I started this blog in 2007? Heres a list:Nothing.Nothing!?!Yeah, nothing.Oh, come on, surely some things have gotten better since 2007, right?What about wide tires?Nah, we had those.What about gravel bikes?Nah, we had those.What about bike lanes?Nah, theyre just full of electric vehicles now.See the Byrnian ideal of the gentleman bicyclist that Transportation Alternatives and the Smug-telligentsia were pushing back when this blog started never really materialized:And instead we got this:And getting stuck behind a slow-moving electric cargo bike is actually a best-case scenario these days:The campaign returns as concerns continue about dangerous riding behavior, particularly involving illegal e-bikes and high-speed e-bikes operating on city streets and sidewalks, reads a news release from Bottchers office.In the past month, there have been several high-profile bike and scooter accidents and injuries on the Upper West Side and in New York City, including two in Central Park, where one woman out jogging wasleft in a coma,and another where a 17-year-old boy e-bike rider died after ramming into a car near City Hall.Of course it might all be worth it if all this stuff was replacing cars like advocates always said it would, but in fact the opposite has happened:Basically we presented people with a choice between large motor vehicles and micromobility, and they chose accordingly:Meanwhile, the human-powered bicycle remained the domain of the butt plug enthusiasts, only now you need to charge them in order to work the shifters.Speaking of whichWhat about 1X drivetrains?Nah, its a step backwards.What about 1X drivetrains that require batteries?Nah, thats two steps backwards.Go ahead, keep asking questions, I can do this all day.Speaking of butt plugs, I do see theyre still managing to squeeze in more cogs:It is of course very important that Shimano do this, because obviously theyre lagging behind:[Do we need to say lags behind? Is there another way to lag? Can you lag ahead?]Good point. Tadej Pogaar uses 12-speed Dura-Ace. So this would explain his dismal performance this season.As far as Im concerned, the only noteworthy cog number change was whenever bikes went from one to two speeds, which was a whopping 100% increase. After that, every additional cog is proportionately less interesting, and you cant argue with math. So I dont know why the bike media makes a big deal about going from 12 speed to 13 speed when they could be fawning over the 100% increase you get when you go double on a Roaduno instead:Someone should make a video on that.